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01/18/2005: "Ice Cube is Down with the PG"

Newsflash: PASS on the Radio Tonight (01/18/05)


Patriots Against Senator Santorum
will be featured tonight at 10:00 pm on the "The Live Mike" hosted by Mike
Romigh (KDKA Radio in Pittsburgh). According to Mike, the station can be
heard in over 38 states.

I've always been intrigued by how one thought naturally leads into another.
For example, a few nights ago I was watching TV when I saw an ad for one of
those "the whole family will enjoy this insipid comedy from the producers
of some other total shit" flicks. What sets this movie apart from the other
celluloid atrocities current lowering the collective IQs of America's young
is that it stars former NWA member Ice Cube.

One of the things that you have to love about Capitalism is its ability to
co-opt any sub-culture no matter how radical. The man who once told us all
to "Fuck the police" is now appearing in a film that's so
sugar-coated diabetics have be warned to stay at least six blocks away from
theaters show it.

Hey, I've read The Conquest of Cool, so I should've seen this
coming. After all, somebody is making major bank from those Che Guevara
t-shirts and Courtney Love just approved Fruity Nirvana Breakfast
Cereal. Still, I couldn't help but thing "Isn't this the kind of
shit-film that Sinbad used to make?"

And that go me thinking about one of the turning points of my life.
A little encounter that I like to call "The Sinbad Incident."

About 15 years ago, I was paying for some food at the supermarket when
the checkout girl looked at the clock on the way and said "I'd better get
home in time to catch Sinbad's HBO special."

"Why?" was all I could manage to wring from my shocked mind.

"Because he's funny."

"No he isn't." I had crawled back into the world of the living and set
about explaining the myriad of reasons why SINBAD IS NOT AND WILL NEVER
BE FUNNY.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. He's not funny" the girl said after a few
moments reflection.

"I'm glad I could be of help."

"But I'm still gonna watch him tonight."

"But we've just established that SINBAD IS NOT AND WILL NEVER BE FUNNY."

"Yeah, but he makes me laugh."

You see, some people - even when presented with overwhelming evidence to
the contrary - will hang on to their current belief system. A perfect
example of this would be the War in Iraq. It's been proven beyond a shadow
of a doubt that Saddam possessed no Weapons of Mass Destruction and had no
substinative links to al Qaeda., yet not one week goes by during which I
don't hear some old hillbilly rant about how the war is "payback for what
them Iraqis did to us on 9/11."

Another good example would be all those kids from MoveOn.Org who supported
John Kerry because they were against the War.

"But JOHN KERRY VOTED FOR THE WAR!" I'd scream at them before reminding
them of Kerry's support for The Patriot Act and No Child Left Behind.

"Yeah, but I'm against those things so I'm gonna vote for Kerry. Maybe he
can get Sinbad to perform at his inauguration."

I don't ask for much (because I ask for a lot), but I pray daily to
Dionysus that should I ever be presented with evidence that contradicts
a long-held opinion of mine I'll have the courage to not to dismiss it.

Replies: 17 Comments

on Tuesday, January 18th, Jackalope said

Ya know, Rodney, all of us respect your opinion. If we didn't, we'd all be cruising the message boards at Hillary Duff's site. While I agree with you 1000% about Sinbad's inability to make me laugh, I am wondering who you actually DO find funny. A few months ago, I brought up the name of Bill Hicks. I thought that of all the funnymen out there, you may at least agree with me on his funny, but dead, carcass. But you slammed him. Personally, I have no respect for the dead. But this guy went on stage and talked about Rush Limbaugh laying in a tub so Ronald Reagan, George H. W. Bush and Dan Quayle could piss on him. He was the Rodney Anonymous of the comedy circuit, but you dismissed him. Again, I restate, I respect your opinion. So, who do you find funny, if not Bill Hicks? I'm looking for laughs because this week's inauguration is going to send me into a life-record depression and I need some input.

on Tuesday, January 18th, razlerja said

"The sin which is unpardonable is knowingly and wilfully to reject truth, to fear knowledge lest that knowledge pander not to thy prejudices." ~Aliester Crowley/The Book of Balance

"I will hold no opinion which can not be changed by five minutes of good conversation." ~Andy Bresnan/Mouthing Off Drunk in Some Philly Bar

on Tuesday, January 18th, razlerja said

Jack,

Don't fret so over Bush's second term. As I said many months before the election, another four years of Bush will only be superficially different from what four years of Kerry would have been. Don't get me wrong, I wanted Bush to lose too. But, either of those two chuckel-heads being Pres. doesn't really change my life THAT much (as to say send me into a 'life-record depression'). Just ignore him and in four years he'll go away.

on Tuesday, January 18th, SlowMotionRiot said

I just hope for the sake of my clean underwear that they didn't force Ice Cube to wear a Cosby Sweater.

on Tuesday, January 18th, SirAtededge said

Sinbad not funny? Even Stewey Griffith, after losing to him on Star Search, had to concede "'White people in the mall be looking like zombies', heh, I suppose he's right."

on Tuesday, January 18th, billzebub said

Speaking of things that aren'y funny...glad you brought up the Family Guy. It's back with a vengeance. I thought we decalred good riddance on that tripe 2 years ago. Meh. Carlin and Chris Rock are funny.

on Tuesday, January 18th, SirAtededge said

You're perfectly entitled to not like the Family Guy since art-hating philistinism is not illegal. You just have to learn to appreciate it, like the innards of a dead camel if you feng shui the organs.

Back to the topic, how about the other ICEomer, Ice T, star of "Pimps Up, Hoes Down" recreated as the dedicated, sensitive sex crimes cop on SVU. Add that to Keller from "Oz" being the other half of the sketch and the irony flows like tasty syrup.

on Wednesday, January 19th, Paul Kircher said

I wonder if the world will ever get to know the real Sinbad, the man behind the comedy

on Wednesday, January 19th, briannirvana said

I like Ice Cube. I like the line:
Even saw the lights of the Goodyear blimp and it read Ice Cube’s a pimp
Or:
Today I didn’t even have to use my AK, I gots to say it was a good day.

Just because Cube wants to make money, WTF wrong with that.
This is a capitalist society, if Larry Flint wanted to sponsor a PG movie or a children’s story what’s wrong with that?
Money is good and Ice Cube has every right to hate police and make PG movies.
But yes, I can say hypocrite and that too can make you rich.

BTW sinbad is whiter than both rodney and I combined.
hey sinbad wearing an earing dont make you black.

on Wednesday, January 19th, briannirvana said

01 19 05
The Capitalist and the Dreamer

I am a purveyor, a vendor and a customer, the capitalist.
I have liberty and religion and the free exercise thereof;
I have the freedom to express grievances in print,
Or I may simply speak the truth according to myself.

I am not the capitalist; I have no freedom
But that which my country dishes out,
So I have no grievance or secret thought
But that which I find in the happiest dream.

on Wednesday, January 19th, the drunk mailman said

sin bad good bad and salty too http://www.toontracker.com/sinbad/sinbadjr.htm

on Thursday, January 20th, ein said

That's what's missing from children's entertainment these days: blatant homoeroticism.

on Thursday, January 20th, briannirvana said

Ever see the character Him on Power puff girls?
Him is a devil who wears a pink tutu and talks very fruity.

on Thursday, January 20th, Scott Hanstein said

I'm glad Ice Cube is starring in this pile of shit. I love watching Ice Cube in interviews, discussing his current "film."

When asked about "Are We There Yet?" he said something like "Yea, it's a saying that's been 'round a long time.....and aint nobody made a movie about it 'til now."

Come on, that's hillarious. The shit he says just to try to make some cash cracks me up.

on Thursday, January 20th, billzebub said

I love that transvestite devil from PowerPuff Girls. He's so disturbing.

on Friday, January 21st, hedgroz said

There's a store, but don't point
walk inside, case the joint
one man behind the counter
another in the back
go out to the car and load the gat
grab the ski mask
here's the task:
go in broke, come out with cash
'Were you slick?'
yeah, you gotta be cunnin'
told Ice Cube to leave the car runnin'"

Even in '88 the evidence was there. According to Eazy-E Ice Cube was the "getaway driver" guy out of the gang of hardened sucka-gattin', ho-killin', mama-smackin', liquor-store-robbin', bailiff-humiliatin' criminals. Kind of like the token tough guy in every boy band, but in reverse.

"Oh, you guys go ahead, I'll just sit here in the car."

Makes me wonder why he's popular. Or who his biggest fans are. But of course, the answer is suburbanites...same people that made NWA go platinum....Just imagine the movies Kid Rock is going to be starring in in 15 years...

on Saturday, January 22nd, Patrick Kowalczyk said

It warms the heart when one spreads the word of Sinbad's comedic anemia. And the Moveon.org kids did more to damage our potential third party resistance than even the morons in power. I demand a recount. I think America went Green this time and no one believed it. After all, would millions of voters truly be dumb enough to opt for one of two flavors of good old Yale-fried, Skull and Bones-style neocon dogshit? I would hope not...