[Previous entry: "A Low Down Dirty Shame"] [Next entry: "The Greatest Conspiracy of Our Time Revealed"]
01/11/2005: "Point. Counter Point."
OK, here's my reply to Mr. Townley (Posted here because his site doesn't
allow for long comments). After this, I'm moving on and, in the words of
Bill O'Reilly, "I will never speak of it again."
Dear Mr. Townley,
First, let me just say what an honor it was to be featured on your site as
I feel that anything that leads to greater dialog between conflicting
points of view is a step in the right direction.
Unfortunately, I have been suffering from a terrible sinus infection so
I was only able to quickly peruse the piece when it was originally posted
on Sunday. Now that I'm feeling better and have gotten a chance to study
what you've written there are a few comments I'd like to make.
Yes, I am a proud Marxist. As I'm sure are many devotees of the Philosopher
Hegel. I am also a proud Capitalist (God, I love money), a proud Socialist
(Utopian not Scientific), and a proud Communist (I'm sure that in your
lifetime you must've purchased a product or service produced by a
corporation which was owned and operated by its employees. Of course you
have. In which case, you've supported Communism).
I believe that all of these economic systems have their valid points as
well as their drawbacks. As someone who's surly read Das Kapitol (how
could you feel justified in discussing Marx if you haven't?), I'm certain
you've meant with the annoyance of trying to discuss Marx (who had many
good things to say about America) with someone who instantly starts
talking about Stalin. As I'm sure you're well aware, Stalin was about as
much of a Marxist as Tim McVeigh was a Christian.
I'm not sure which economic system Jesus would align himself with but,
seeing what Capitalism has done to Christmas, I know which one I wouldn't
bet on.
But I digress…
As I am a proud Marxist/Capitalist/Socialist/Communist, I am also a proud
Atheist/Christian /Jew/Hindu/Buddhist/Pagan/Hoochy Koochy Man. Theology,
in my opinion, should be viewed as a buffet. Although I must confess that
most religions would be more palatable to me if they'd boil their dogma
down to "Love each other". That would save a lot of time that has
previously been wasted burning heretics.
Speaking of buffets, I'm sorry if I poked fun at your size. That was
incredibly wrong of me and something that I will always regret doing. Just
so you know: I'm rather chunky and very bald. I'm sure that you cut a much
more dashing figure than I do (although I do have a sort of "animal
magnetism" that far to complex to explain here. Please see the twelve
volume autobiography of Casanova for further details).
I was just using your size to show how ridicules it is not to allow two
people who are in love (and over 18 and not related by blood [don't you
find it odd that many of the same states that are opposed to same-sex
marriage are more than happy to let first cousins marry]) to marry just
because they happen to be of the same sex. By the way, it seems to me
that if you're really interested in preserving marriage, you should push
for a constitutional ban on divorce. Oh, and since the Bible defines
marriage as the union between a man and ONE OR MORE WOMEN the amendment
may require some small tinkering to bring it perfectly in-line with the
Good Book.
Which brings me to your comment about being against "special rights" for
Homosexuals:
I'm not quite sure how asking for the same rights as everybody else can
be equated with "special privileges". If you could explain this to both
me and your readers I would be forever grateful.
Also, I never claimed that you were an "old southerner who's proud that
they fought to keep Blacks out of their schools." I was just pointing out
how conservative positions (from "the Sun goes around the Earth" to "You
Blacks might be more comfortable in the back of the bus") tend to not to
sand up to the test of time.
Now, as to the Oliver North interview:
Paul informed me that Oliver North would be calling in and asked me if I'd
like to call in and ask him a question. Paul had no knowledge as to what I
was going to ask Mr. North. Honestly, just to get that question out in the
open, I would've adopted a Mexican accent and called in as "Carlos".
I'm not sure how Mr. North, as you claim answered my questions and "put up
a great defense from a hair-brained conspiracy theorist", when Mr. North
never spoke about Costa Rica - only Nicaragua. Next time you ask your
Minister about Jesus and he lectures you on the teachings of the late
Benny Hill, I suggest that you compliment him on how deftly he answered
your question.
This may not be my place, but I'm not sure that a conservative Christian
like you should be praising Mr. North who - IN HIS OWN HAND WRITING -
admitted to financing arms with the sale of drugs.
Speaking of out of place, I can't help but feel that you stepped out of
bounds when you mentioned my late friend whom I loved like a brother. True,
I went after you first but I didn't dig into your past for anything that
may explain your beliefs.
This said, I still wish you the best of luck and feel that we may yet
find common ground.
PS. Writing "He's just got a God shaped whole in His [thanks for deifying
me] heart" just before "poor grammar" was brilliant. I plan on stealing that.
Replies: 30 Comments
on Tuesday, January 11th, razlerja said
"Speaking of buffets"... I damn near pissed myself when I read that. Really first rate, my friend.
on Tuesday, January 11th, Andrew said
Bang up job, Rodney
I could post a page of comments but I'd be preaching to the choir
on Tuesday, January 11th, Nigel Tailwind said
I'm going to start a band named Whole. Maybe AssWhole.
on Tuesday, January 11th, razlerja said
I like 'GodWhole' better...but don't do Christian Rock. That would be just plain sad.
on Tuesday, January 11th, briannirvana said
What about Søren Kierkegaard?
He wanted a society to refuse to read 'papers.
its early and im drunk.
uh Gottfied Benn was using his skin for wallpaper.
'paper.
on Tuesday, January 11th, katinka-katinka said
I would buy a shirt that said He's just got a God shaped whole in His heart.
on Tuesday, January 11th, Rodney said
Brian,
Don't get me started on Kierkegaard. My friend Dave Brookman and I went a period when we couldn't stop making Kierkegaard jokes. Have you read Kierkegaard's "Either or"? If not, I'll sum it up for you: Either you're unhappy or you're sad.
Great book.
on Tuesday, January 11th, crapmonkey said
id buy that shirt as well...
on Tuesday, January 11th, sully said
Great letter Rod. I pissed myself when I read the last paragraph.
We need a drying machine here at work...
on Tuesday, January 11th, briannirvana said
Baldness is not a fault.
and sometimes overwieght people have glandular problems. I am bald and Rodney is over a decade older than me and he has fuller, thicker, hair than I. He should grow a bitchin beard like me and Whitman. Whitman's beard went white, I have grey under my lower lip and Im only 30.
on Tuesday, January 11th, briannirvana said
John Berryman the US confessional Poet exposed me to Soren.
Berryman won a lot of awards and was well respected and he wrote a dream song where he chastised Soren and the poem was popular. It was like Cat Stevens and Rushdie. People wanted Berryman's head for that 1 poem. there are 385 eighteen line dream songs. 12 lines are about Kierkegarrd.
big fuckin' deal.
Berryman is my Personal Jesus btw. has been since 2000.
on Tuesday, January 11th, briannirvana said
http://plato.stanford.edu/entries/kierkegaard/
on Tuesday, January 11th, Paul Kircher said
Hey Rodney, I hopy you don't mnd if I practice my HTML coding on your comments section :P Paul
www.paulkircher.com
on Tuesday, January 11th, briannirvana said
John Berryman
Dream Song 53
He lay in the middle of the world, and twicht.
More Sparine for Pelides,
human (half) & down here as he is,
with probably insulting mail to open
and certainly unworthy words to hear
and his unforgiving memory.
--I seldom go to films. They are too exciting,
said the Honourable Possum.
--It takes me so long to read the 'paper,
said to me one day a novelist hot as a firecracker,
because I have to identify myself with everyone in it,
including the corpses, pal.'
Kierkegaard wanted a society, to refuse to read 'papers,
and that was not, friends, his worst idea.
Tiny Hardy, toward the end, refused to say anything, a programme adopted early on by long Housman,
and Gottfried Benn
said:--We are using our own skins for wallpaper and we cannot win.
on Tuesday, January 11th, briannirvana said
As for the asshole pictures that keep interupting my Media Player:
Whatever gets you through the night 'salright, 'salright
It's your money or life 'salright, 'salright
Don't need a sword to cut through flowers oh no, oh no
Whatever gets you through your life 'salright, 'salright
Do it wrong or do it right 'salright, 'salright
Don't need a watch to waste your time oh no, oh no
on Tuesday, January 11th, Paul Kircher said
I guess your flock does mind my practicing HTML coding on your comments section :)
I'll stop ;)
Peace
on Tuesday, January 11th, IVOTEDFORZUES said
I wondered why the Strokes were playing.
on Tuesday, January 11th, sully said
Did anyone notice he posted his "rebuttal" of Rod's rebuttal of his "rebuttal?" He sounds a little apologetic, but still a little insane.
http://alittleabouteverything.com/
on Tuesday, January 11th, ScreamingMan said
Hiel Hiel!
on Tuesday, January 11th, billzebub said
Allow me to use this space to mention that billzebub can put all manner of clever sayings on shirts. And I can do it in Communist/Capitalist/Socialist /Marxist/and Free Enterprise style.
on Tuesday, January 11th, Jackalope said
Let me add my kudos already heaped on Rodney's post. It was missing only one word, at the very end: "Cock."
Billzebub: You could make a killing marketing shirts that say "Intentionally Left Blank" to federal employees.
on Wednesday, January 12th, Rory said
Is that Eva Mendez in that video? And I'm glad to see that Rodney and Randy kissed and made up. It gave me a happy feeling. "Rodney and Randy" has a nice ring to it. Perhaps you should consider making a Christian/atheist album.
on Wednesday, January 12th, Andrew said
A split 7"
It could be like that Born Against Screaching Weasel split
on Wednesday, January 12th, Andrew said
I just read Townley's response. I'm glad they've setteled this... or agreed to disagree. But I have a question. Am I the only one who is insulted when people say they're going to pray for you? It's like they understand your beliefs and position and disregard it.
I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate it if the Church of the Sub-Genius said that. Or if the Queer Eye guys prayed for his living room.
on Wednesday, January 12th, Pistaugh said
Or if the servants of great Cthulhu decided to call up some primordial ooze-monster in his honor.
...working on it
on Wednesday, January 12th, razlerja said
I'll ask the shambling chaos Nyarlathothep to speak at his next church meeting.
on Wednesday, January 12th, razlerja said
Check it out:
http://givemetoys.com/product/TVCTHULHUNYARLATHOTE?meta=a10b
on Wednesday, January 12th, briannirvana said
Paul your not an asshole, I was drunk.
sorry,
friends?
on Wednesday, January 12th, sully said
I shall pray for Randy to get laid.
on Wednesday, January 12th, Grundy Sherwood said
I'm most offended when people say they are going to pray for me to become one of them. It's like saying I'm going to beat you with a salami until you decide to beat other people with a salami. I don't need your fuckin' salami, OK pal!
