10/21/2004: "Rosie the Riveter meets Michelle the Moron"
Michelle Malkin kicked off her column yesterday (which happened to be her
43rd Birthday. Happy Birthday, Michelle) with a little history lesson
about the role played by women in manufacturing during WWII which can be
summed up thusly: "We're at war, so do like Grandma did - shut up and
Does this mean that Michelle is going to stop writing her column and start
working on the assembly line at Lockheed Martin? No. But we're still free
Michelle is pissed at Rosie the Riveter's heir whom she calls "Sally the
Sniveler". "Sally the Sniveler"? Shit, Luther, "Mary the Minimum Wage
Earner" or "Wendy the Working Poor" I could understand, but "Sally the
Sniveler"? I know that I went to a State University, but I just don't get
What could Malkin be thinking? Well, there's only one way to find out.
Gentle reader, gird your loins, because we are about to step inside the
Mind of Michelle Malkin.
According to Malkin, "Sally the Sniveler" is a member of "Hysterical Women
for Kerry" (Kudos to Michelle for attempting to launch two catch-phrases at
once.). OK. And who are "Hysterical Women for Kerry"? Well, if Michelle is
to be believed they are:
…self-absorbed celebrities who support banning all guns (except the ones
their bodyguards use to protect them and their children)…
Again, I find myself confused. Are celebrities that large of a segment of
the population that they actually form a voting block? And have you, gentle
reader, ever heard someone, who's not wearing a tinfoil hat, suggest that
we ban all guns? If we banned all guns, Hollywood - the home of the
Action movie - would grind to a halt. Will Smith may not know much (he did,
after all, move out of Philly) but he does know that you won't pay
$6.50 to watch him stop a crazed killer with a stern talking to. So, as
clearly demonstrated, it's Michelle who clearly needs to shut the fuck up.
They are teachers' union bigwigs who support keeping all children
hostage in public schools (except their own sons and daughters who have
access to the best private institutions).
Yo, my Nigs, it's time to step up and recognize my mad math skillz. Thanks
to 20 plus years of Right Wing economic policies, less than 11% of the
private workforce belongs to a union. So, if these "bigwigs" are out there
preaching, it's to a pretty small congregation. But the real question here
is "Why should the head of the AFL-CIO give a fuck rather or not anybody
else's kids go public or private schools?" Consider this another
demonstration that it's Michelle who clearly needs to shut the fuck up.
They are sanctimonious environmentalists who oppose ostentatious energy
consumption (except for their air-conditioned Malibu mansions and
Gulfstream jets and custom Escalades.)
WTPFMYV? Lemme get this straight? There are hypocrites in Hollywood?
"Hello, Daily Planet? Stop the presses! Clark Kent just flew in my window
and told me something that you are never gonna fuckin' believe!"
OK, so Hollywood is the land of "do as my agent says not as I do". Why
does this make stricter environmental laws a bad idea? By this logic, or
lack thereof, Michelle should no longer be a Christians because ministers
and priests have been engaging in boy-buggering for two thousand years
(OK, ministers have only been at it for 400 years). If someone who knows
Michelle is reading this, would you please pass along the following
message: Michelle, you clearly need to shut the fuck up.
They are antiwar activists who claim to love the troops (except when
they're apologizing to the terrorists trying to kill our men and women
Huh? Ignoring the fact that the war (at least when it started) had nothing
to do with terrorism, have you ever heard an antiwar activist apologize to
a terrorist? Why would they? Michelle statement isn't just stupid, it's
insane - and clear proof that she needs to stop sniveling and shut the
They are peace activists who balk at your son bringing in his "Star
Wars" light saber for the kindergarten Halloween parade (but who have no
problem serving as human shields for torture-loving dictators).
This is what I love best about Malkin. Just when you think that she can't
get any crazier, she tops herself. The above statement not only
demonstrates that Michelle should shut the fuck up, but also shows that
she has no understanding of how children (well, male children)
behave when handed a large, plastic representation of their phallus.
These parents don't want kids bringing light sabers to school because
they're pot-smoking peaceniks. No, these parents have enough common sense
to know that any kids holding a plastic weapon is gonna smack the living
shit outta some other kid before the final bell rings.
They are ultrafeminists who purport to speak for all women (but not the
unborn ones or the abstinent teenage ones or the minority conservative
ones or the newly enfranchised ones in Afghanistan).
Um, wasn't it Feminists who fought for pre-natal care, "No means No", Civil
Rights, and against the Taliban? Michelle needs to exercise her right to
shut the fuck up.
Look, for over 20 years the Right have controlled the Government and the
Media. Yet, America still hasn't turned into a Capitalist paradise. Since
the Reactionary elements in this country isn't going to admit their
mistakes, they need someone to blame - hence to straw-man of the "Liberal
Elite". It's kinda like when your cousin, who dropped outta High School
and refuses to get his GED, blames Halliburton for his inability to get
a job. He needs to shut the fuck up, too.
anagkazw - force, compel
If the above word looks like ippojshit to you,
then you need to go here
and download the SPIONIC font for either MAC or PC. Dude.