Meet Our New "Blair"
As most of you know, we here at RATYHL haven't heard anything (no E-Letters, invites to Mom-Time getaways, or thinly-veiled pleas for cash - nothing) from Lisa "Blair" Whelchel in a long, long time. The moment has come when we collectively need to face the cruelest of the Facts of Life: Blair is gone and she's not coming back. It's time to get on with our lives; it's time that we found a new Blair.
But where does one even begin looking for a replacement Blair? Natalie, Tootie (best freakout ever), Joe, and Cousin Geri are all way too sane to meet our criteria and Tony Blair is much too dull...and gullible. What we need is a likable, if misguided, Right Wing loon; and those just don't grow on trees. Well, at least not the likable kind.
At first, the situation seemed hopeless. Then, after the RATYHL staff had spent months searching the globe (Nathan was last seen in Tangier), I stumbled upon this a just few days ago:
And my heart sang out for I knew that my days of wandering through a Blairless wilderness were, at last, over.
Sweet, merciful moss-buggerin' Jeebuz, this site has everything you could possibly ever want in an F-list celebrity stream-of-semi-consciousness rant repository. Name a subject (with the possible exception of "Paris in the spring vs. London in the autumn") and Charlie has gotten all introspective about it. Here's Charlie on the economy:
"I know about as much about the stock market as a mule knows about the Theory of Relativity, and probably even less about international finance and such."
They are atheist [sic] in philosophy and political in nature and pick they're [sic] causes accordingly... Although I totally despise the ACLU as an organization I feel sorry for the individual members because a higher court will convene some day where the decisions are final and eternal, where the only person to plead cases will be the Christ the ACLU is so determined to do away with and if He is not your lawyer you're in trouble, real trouble.
The first time I heard about the Book of Revelation and the antichrist I was very young and it was impossible for even the most astute Bible scholar to figure out. But as time has gone by and knowledge and technology have exponentially increased the pieces have fallen in place and the time of the antichrist could happen very soon.
The only negative note is that the Shitbox is no longer accepting new members, which, for the time being at least, prevents me from being able to post my opinions right alongside Charlie's. In lieu of that tawdry satisfaction, each weekend I'll be dissecting Charlie's latest missives and casting his pearls of wisdom before you lot of snarky, elitist swine.