Thoughtless for the Day

...Two little boots

Caligula, in case you didn't know, wasn't Caligula's real name; it's a nickname derived from"caligulae": meaning"little boots". While most people wisely jettison their childhood nicknames by the time they reach puberty (Is than anything sadder than addressing a grown man as"Scooter"?), Caligula hung on to his. Why?

As small child, Caligula got to live every toddler's dream by accompanying his parents, Germanicus and Agrippina the Elder, on dad's bloody conquest of the northern German tribes. At some point, someone got the idea into their head of dressing the two-year-old future emperor up in a tiny soldier outfit, complete with...1, 2, 3...little boots.

Now that's cuter than anything the baby Jesus ever did! And Caligula was actually a more productive child than that no-good lay-about-in-the-manger-all-day Jesus. It seems that Caligula had become a sort of mascot to father's troops. When the troops revolted over because Emperor Tiberius extended their enlistments and screwed them on bonus pay, Germanicus naturally became a little worried for the safety of his then-pregnant wife and small son, so he arranged for them to leave the camp. The legionaries were so grief –stricken by the proposed departure of"little boots" that then ceased their revolt on the spot.

If the baby Jesus would've stopped a riot, it would be called a miracle. Because it was Caligula, it's just an amusing anecdote.

By the way, History remains mute on the subject of whether or not anyone ever took the nickname"Magnagula".

Speaking of Little Boots