Thoughtless for the Day

The latest Aid or Invade has been published/posted. If you can tear yourselves away from your bongs long enough to look at the bottom of the piece (and squint) you'll notice the URL for this very website. Golly, I sure am glad, now that plenty of folks may be checking this digital train wreck out for the first time, that I went with that Facts of Life/Fisting piece yesterday. Hello and goodbye, new readers.

"Scripture also says 'Render unto Caesar what Caesar demands.' And right now, Caesar demands a building permit," - County Commission Chairman Mike Whitehead

While we're on the subject of tragedies, Dinosaur Adventure Land is no more (since it was a shithole to begin with, it's also no less). Those of you who are unfamiliar with Dinosaur Adventure Land are probably also unfamiliar with searing migraines and troubling dreams of a once-great nation now completely owned and operated by village idiots; so you may want to skip the rest of this piece. The rest of you may remember Dinosaur Adventure Land as the creationist theme park (AKA "Some Fundie's backyard") scratched out of the soil by Kent "Dr. Dino" Hovind, former science teacher-turned-minister-turned-defendant in a felony assault/battery/burglary with assault or battery case (Evolution in reverse). While nearby Disney World may be able to boast about Space Mountain and The Haunted Mansion, only Dinosaur Adventure Land had exclusive bragging right s to "Jumpasaurus": a trampoline on which kids bounce while trying to throw a ball through a hoop and "the Nerve-Wracking Ball": a bowling ball suspended from a rope tied to a tree branch*.

Now that Dinosaur Adventure Land has closed its doors, those of us wishing for a completely brain-free experience will have to wait until the talking turds at AiG complete their Creation Museum.

* What fun is a bowling ball tied to a rope? Not much. It's even less fun when a child is made to test their "faith in God's laws" by standing behind the ball while a park guide gives it a healthy push so that the ball sails off and comes back only a few inches from the child's face. The kid "wins" if he or she doesn't flinch or shit their pants. Yay America; yay us!