Boycott Reality
Salvete opimi oratores,
I'm going to break RATYHTL's longest standing policy, gentle reader, and be honest with you. In a perfect world, the only politics that I would ever write about would be the politics of the people who lived around the Mediterranean Sea from shortly before the voyage of the Argo until shortly after the crowdedly murder of Hypatia of Alexandria.
Of course, the world isn't perfect and nothing proves this more than a little website, which my friend Paul B. recently brought to my attention, called Boycott Liberalism. No matter what your political leanings are, you are going to enjoy the living shit out of Boycott Liberalism...but definitely not for the reasons that "editor" (normally the title "editor" implies that you have a staff of writers whose work you edit. As far as I can tell, Boycott Liberalism appears to be the work of a single, lonely, individual) Thomas N. George wishes you would. Remember the first time you saw that website about how John Lennon was really killed by hack writer Stephen "Boo! Did I scare you?" King? Well, prepare to fall in love all over again.
Before you read any further, I want you to open another browser window and check out Mr. George's "Predictions" page. Sylvia Browne would be proud.
Do you see it? No, not "The truth is that the resignations from the Bush Administration Cabinet after his first term were result of the long hours and hard work" or "Michael Jackson will be found guilty. (not incorrect- Michael Jackson's troubles with the law is not over )" I'm talking about "The story of an alien spaceship crashing in Roswell is true." Tether you trireme and curb you Cerberus, those goddamn Liberals have used their control of the Jewish media to cover up the fact that aliens (not the Mexican kind) walk among us!
This site is like a big, beautiful Valentine from the Twilight Zone. And it only gets better. Check out Tommy's cartoon archive. Thank you, thank you, thank you Thomas N. George! Not only for the fact that, at long last, I've finally found something that makes Life with the Poor look professional, but also for the countless hours I plan on spending replacing your captions with my own.
Nothing drives the comedy home better than a trip back to the homepage. It would seem that, among many, many other things, Tommy would like his readers to be sure to boycott the movie Manderlay, as if anyone who would take Boycott Liberalism seriously and might happen to wander off the grounds of the asylum might be itching to see Lars von Trier's sequel to Dogville. Christ, I fucking love this site!
Tommy, if you're reading this, I beg you to go "Ol' School" and call for a boycott of restaurants which let Blacks sit at the counter, men who refuse to beat their wives, and scientists who claim that the Earth travels around the sun.
The only drawback to Boycott Liberalism is that the site is so jam packed with crunchy craziness that it's easy to get lost. For example, somewhere on the site (damned if I can find it again) I found the following:
"Liberals protest the deaths of 2,000 soldiers during the Iraq War as they attempt to spread freedom in the world. During that same time - 80,000 Americans died exercising their privilege to drive a car. How come liberals aren't protesting driving?"
If it wouldn't be about as productive as arguing with box of Kleenex, someone could point out to "Editor" George that those 80,000 Americans didn't die while driving around looking for Weapons of Mass Destruction or links to al Qaeda.
If there's one crime that Thomas N. George is guilty of (other than the crime of filling our hearts with a childlike whimsy), it's confusing "Liberalism" with "Being a stupid, smelly Hippie" (I wish the "editor" would change the name of the site to Boycott Stupid, Smelly Hippies). Nowhere is this more evident than on Tommy's the top ten liberal lies page. For some reason Mr. George seems to think that true Liberals love Bill Clinton: the man who gave the world NAFTA, CAFTA, the Defense of Marriage Act, and the Religious Freedom Restoration Act. Tommy is deaf, dumb, and blind to the fact that the people who call themselves Liberals (people who traditionally believe in studying a point of view before developing an opinion about it) are actually as far from being "Freethinkers" as one can possible get.
But can Thomas N. George really be faulted for not understanding the difference between an educated Liberal and dogmatic Hippy? No, and not just because Tommy is about as lucid as the waiting room at the Haight Ashbury Free Clinic. Shit Luther, there a countless Americans who identify themselves as "Conservative" (people who traditionally believe in small government and limited US intervention abroad) when they are, in fact, dumbshit illiterate pig fucking hillbilly Fundies.
ultra - beyond, on the other side of